Vitamix Broccoli Cheddar Soup

Don't worry; I'm well aware that those croutons look dumb.

I never would have thought a broccoli cheese soup could be described as “ladylike,” but the texture here was nothing if not graceful. Mint green, and flowing like Audrey Hepburn’s wrap in Funny Face. 

Just think green and also soup.

 

Broccoli + Cheese = Ethereal? Apparently it is when the Vitamix is added to the equation. It was so thin and silky that the best description I can think of is broccoli cheddar water – and I really do mean that in a good way. Straight out of the blender, it was steamy and beautiful, perfect for a night of gossipmongering and watching YouTube videos with my steamy, beautiful ladyfriends.

 

Steamy.

It’s too bad we didn’t eat the soup straight out of the blender. If I could do takebacksies, I would have lugged the Vitamix over to Julie’s and made it all right there. Each batch takes less than 10 minutes, after all. Yeah, it’s pretty loud, but we talk really loud. It would have been fine. Instead I made it at home, and by the time I got to the party the soup had revolted. It tasted the same, yes, which was fine, but the texture was completely altered. It was like the broccoli was trying to reassemble itself into heads. Compared to the thin, airy stream of soup that I poured into my containers, what I poured out was approximately a kajillion times thicker.  

Luckily, Grace made party bread. So who cares about soup.

 

I can’t blame the broccoli for fighting back. After all, I put it through some intense physiological changes in such a short period of time. If you skinned, cut, steamed, liquefied, transported and reheated me – I can’t say I’d be ready for company. (That is such a gross thing I just typed. Read it again and try not to picture it.)

If I had a Christmas wish for the whole world, it would be Snowville milk for errrrrbody.

In an additional display of empathy, I fully understand being upset about temperature changes. On the way to work this morning, I saw a city worker sweeping a trash off gross, dirty, icy snow banks. It's okay, Soup. I 100% didn't want to go outside, either.

As written, if you have a Vitamix and you like broccoli and cheddar, I think this is a good way to go. If not, grab your girlfriends and a bottle box of wine, and make some connections. 

Julie has excellent bowls.

In the end, I'll forget how disappointed I was by the way this soup travelled. What I'll remember is being so grateful for real conversations, almost disturbingly deep laughs, and the fact that Hilly brought Valentine's Day candy. If I had three Twix, is that a Trix?

Vitamix Broccoli Cheddar Soup

Adapted a little bit from the official Vitamix recipe

Serves 2

GET THIS STUFF

For soup:
1 cup low fat milk
1/2 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1 1/2 cups broccoli florets, steamed
1 teaspoon diced onion
1/2 teaspoon vegetable base (I like Better than Bouillon Organic) or 1/2 of a vegetable bouillon cube (I like Rapunzel)

For garnish:
1 thick slice of sourdough, cut into cubes
1 teaspoon olive oil
1/2 cup broccoli florets, steamed
1/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese
1/2 green onion, sliced

DO THIS WITH IT

Place all soup ingredients in Vitamix and blend on high until steam pours out the top (or about 6 minutes). 

Heat oven to 350 degrees. Toss sourdough cubes with olive oil and a bit of sea salt on a cookie sheet. Bake for 5 or 6 minutes, until crispy and starting to brown.

Put silicone mat on cookie sheet, and place split 1/4 cup shredded cheddar into two little piles on the mat. Throw some green onion on top of the cheddar, and place in oven for about 10 minutes. Take the crisps off the mat and place on a paper towel to drain a bit.

Split 1/2 cup steamed broccoli florets between two bowls and pour soup over top. Top with croutons and a cheese crisp.